Friday, September 24, 2010

I Conquered No Mountain

Coming home from a very long day is indeed a treat in itself. Removing my work clothes and shoes and raising my feet on the couch felt so good like winning stakes in the lottery. Whew! I think I really deserve this break to recharge. Earlier, I had another dragging and protracted day. It emptied my petrol tank, so to speak, draining almost all the energy in me.

After feeding my Mum and changing her nappies, I opted to unwind and have a rest on my dad's rocking chair. I thought the night was still young for me to call it a day so I booted my old and trusty notebook to check my mails and messages. I also reckoned I should just kill time while waiting for daybreak in LA so I can wake my wife to be and have a chat. I browsed my facebook account and had a look at some of my friends' posts and threads. By accident, I chanced upon the account of a man not personally known to me but very familiar to the person significant to me. I don't know how it appeared on the side of my own facebook profile. I know, I should have not clicked on that link and opened his page. I know, I should have not snooped around and stalked on his account. Honestly, I really do not do this in real life. I saw many pictures and read information about the old chap. I learned how successful his professional career is, how well travelled he is, how happy his family is, how athletic he can be, how he enjoyed the riches and wealth that life can give... I felt sad. I felt so sorry for myself.

I'm thinking, could life really be so unfair? Or is it really just my fault that I grew old to be like this? Am I so passive, so unassertive, so lame, so docile, so worthless? Why can't I be like that man raising his bike after conquering a mountain peak? Why haven't I conquered any mountain up to this point in time? I guess the answers to aIl of my queries will rely on myself and how I could turn around this miserable life of mine. I know there is still hope, no matter how little it may be. I should act fast and start now while I still have time.